[...] would be a mistake for me to attempt to explain what they are, so click here for a link to a brief description of the mistaken goals of [...]

i would like to invite you to my private blog. i wouldn’t bother you with e-mail questions just need to send you an invititaion to an e-mail address. you know my sister, S webb. she will vouch for me… hopefully. thanks becca (sarah’s sister). what books did you read? i am reading adele faber’s books how to talk… is this the same school of thought as you?
today i watched myself & how i felt while my 3.5 girl was having her classic attention seeking fits. she uses not eating what we cook & crying in the other room for me to hold her to distract (annoy) me. i invite her to join me in the kitchen. nope. it’s her way or the highway. i say ” can i teach you to make a sandwich? yes, but then she won’t eat it. i feel like she wasting my time. i get so frustrated & end up walking away from her, saying nicely (sometimes) when you get dressed you can join me. i just feel like yelling “stop crying or you’re going to bed RIGHT THIS MINUTE!!!” but i don’t i just seath inside!!! it was her brother’s birthday. i got home from work late. i wanted her to get dressed (why she was just in her panties in feb is beyond me) so we could make the cake quick! nope! “i’m cold, hold me…mommy mommy mommy!” i finally calmed down & held her & restated her emotions. “it sounds like you miss me when i go to work…” she consumed so much time that my son didn’t get a cake, or sung to. he almost didn’t get presents. i am so tired, frustrated, aggrivated, annoyed. you name it… can you recomend any good stradagies, books, anything?
thanks becca (sarah’s sister).

vicki@parentingontrack.com

1. Save the sandwich until later and when she is hungry, she can eat that. Make sure you are firm and kind and respectful. Otherwise it will feel like punishment and I can already hear how annoyed you are at this little mischief maker.

2. HMMM Sounds like you have temper tantrums if you don’t get your own way. Seathing is a TT. Just so you know. You are asking a 3.5 year old to do something you can’t do yet.

3. Why do you care if she is in panties? You aren’t. She’s cold? Easy solution, put clothes on or be cold, you decide. Me, I’m making a cake and I would love another set of hands. Entirely up to you darlin.

4. How long did it take her to answer that one question? It sounds like you got totally snookered and couldn’t figure out how to cut the conversation short and get back to the cake. I’m sure your son was thrilled about that. Poor kid.

Listen, as Sarah has pointed out, I don’t pussy foot around. You are making all kinds of mischief here, not the kids. Get the program. If you are serious about your relationship with your kids, get the program. Otherwise you are going to jumping all over the place and that isn’t going to work.

I will be happy to check out the blog.

Hope this helped.

Vicki

PS - Yes, I know I am mean, but I get results. That’s what parents want. They want a better relationship with their kids. That’s what I provide. So decide, are you in or are you out. If you are in, be prepared to hear things you don’t want to hear AND for results that will blow your mind.

V

Ahem. I didn’t say it. Vicki is right she’s hard core and it works. You can do it! It just takes time. It’s taking me time, too. Thanks Vicki! I love you. S.

[...] on Feelings New Mom TV assignment this week – in short, I need to watch what they are doing and keep track about how I FEEL [...]

[...] standing at the door feel COMPLETELY irritated by this simple question and thanks to last week with Parenting on Track - “Mistaken Goals of Behavior”, my brain went “ding”. Attention. Attention. [...]