You take your kids out to eat and then you spend the entire meal nagging, reminding, lecturing and threatening them because they won’t sit still. They are hitting their brothers. They have ordered 3 glasses of chocolate milk and they won’t touch the mac n’ cheese.

You bought your kid the latest video game and now you are reminding and yelling at him to turn it off. He won’t listen, he isn’t doing his chores, his homework is sloppy, he sneaks it under the covers and hides it from you so you can’t grab it.

You gave in to a later bedtime and now you are stomping around the house because an overly tired kid wants your undivided attention and you want some alone time. You are sulking, distant, annoyed, frustrated. The kids is tired, grouchy, bored and all together awful.

What do all these scenarios have in common? One thing.

Children received the privilege of:

• Going out to eat
• Owning a toy
• Staying up late

without ever demonstrating to their parents, that they can handle the responsibilities that go along with all of these situations.

Using Privileges and Responsibilities helps set up an equitable household where they parent feels good about saying, YES! To their child’s growing requests and confident in the boundaries around the yes when they put the responsibilities of SHOW ME squarely on the child’s shoulder.

This week

• Make a list of all the privileges your children currently enjoy that do not include any of the accompanying responsibilities.
• And then decide how you will create a more equitable, balanced relationship, household, and way of being in the world for yourselves and your children.